We have a New Moon, we have lots of wind today and the energy is heightened and in motion!
We are entering holiday season and that can be a blessing and a curse.
It's a time of year that can allow for reflection, time with loved ones, but can also cause fatigue, trigger trauma & be very lonely.
As artists, performers, creatives, this time of year can often be hectic and chaotic and can leave us feeling exhausted and spent. We often need a holiday after the holiday season!
So, may I suggest to you, as I am exploring this for myself too:
YES. and NO.
Not Yes, OR No. AND.
Both words are full sentences. Both words require no explanation and both words can live simultaneously in our lexicon and our lives.
I cannot answer for you, but I know in my own world, I have often answered too quickly. This is why "YES" seemed like a bad word, and "NO" seemed like an excuse, or that it needed an explanation.
Neither. They are both full sentences needing no explanation.
What I have learned, and continue to learn, is that "YES" needs my attention. I need to be present and aligned with the request in order to answer "YES" effectively. I don't want to say "YES" and then immediately regret it, and then go on to wonder why I said I would do that, appear there, take that on, and dread every minute of that "YES".
I have learned that it's not "YES, but...". If there's a "but", I need to think about my answer. It still might not be an automatic "No". "YES" does not have to be the only way in: "What if...", "How about.." could start a response, in order to find a more aligned and satisfactory access to a fully realized "YES" that will give you joy, fulfillment and energy!
And sometimes, it's just simply "No". "No" without explanation or excuse. Just simply and fully, "No".
I think because so many of us are people pleasers, and our life is often feast or famine, we feel we MUST say yes if we can; or, if we have to say no, we have to explain ourselves.
Therein lies the fatigue. Therein lies the mud and slogging and the self-doubt and the worry and wonderings of "what if I had just said...".
Just stop, breathe, take a minute to align. If neither "yes" nor "no" can be accessed in that moment, you aren't ready to commit nor are you ready to walk away.
So, take some time to sit with it, savor it, "pros & cons" it, to figure out if that project, that demand, that expectation, that request aligns with yes, or no.
Only you have to know the "why". When you understand your "why", your decision is clear, and your answer is short, sweet, and leaves no room for interpretation.
Try paying attention to your responses as you enter this season - and see if you make excuses or try to convince yourself or another of your answer. This, my darlings, is where the fatigue comes from. Trust me, it takes one who has done it, to know it, and have I done it!
There is no negative or positive in either answer when it is aligned for YOU. It is simply a full sentence, needing no explanation, no further discussion and should leave you with a smile on your face and room to move through your day as you stay present for your next.
Full stop. Full realization. Authentically YOU.
Susan Eichhorn Young covers all things voice—strong and sophisticated singing and speaking.
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